Wednesday, June 20, 2012

Padres/Rangers Game 3 Pregame Preview: The Yu vs. Some Dude Named "Bass"


Note: We are currently dealing with a malicious virus on Baseball Do (dot) (com)...here is tonight's game 3 pregame preview, in a safe, virus-free, temporary blog site.  

Just over a week ago, the Texas Rangers (42-27) were begging to get out of Cali and back home pronto.  Now, after securing their fourth-straight series win and looking to push their winning streak to six, the Rangers have a fresh outlook on California.

I’ll take “California Dreamin’” over West Coast Screamin’ any old day in Rangers Nation.

Scott Feldman collected his first win of the season in last night’s 7-3 win over the San Diego Padres…and if that wasn’t enough, he put on a hitting display as well—collecting the first RBI of his career. 

But masked by the perfect temperatures and five-game winning streak, there was some trouble afoot. 

First baseman Mitch Moreland strained his left hamstring while attempting to beat out a bases loaded double play ground ball during the second inning.

He’s scheduled for an MRI today, but as of now, his status is listed as day-to-day.  I’d be surprised if he doesn’t require some time on the disabled list.  

You never want a player injured, but the reality is, it happens. And although Moreland is the team’s best first baseman, the Rangers will have no problems sliding in someone if Moreland misses time—Michael Young gets the start tonight.

On the hill for the Texas Rangers, it’s RHP Yu Darvish (8-4, 3.57 ERA, 1.47 WHIP, 9.8 K/9). The Yu looks to complete the sweep of San Diego tonight, as he opposes RHP Anthony Bass (2-7, 4.88 ERA, 1.37 WHIP, 7.9 K/9).

Tonight’s starting lineups:

San Diego Padres (24-45)

RF Will Venable
CF Cameron Maybin
Headley's batting .556 against the Rangers.
LF Mark Kotsay
3B Chase Headley
1B Yonder Alonso
SS Everth Cabrera
C John Baker
2B Alex Amarista
P Anthony Bass

Darvish

The Yu is coming off of one of his best starts this season.  He went eight innings, scattering seven hits and walked just two. Darvish tied a career-high with 11 strikeouts in the Rangers 6-2 win over the Houston Astros.

On the road, Darvish is 2-4 with a 3.98 ERA. At home, he has yet to lose (6-0, 3.15). Petco Park was just what Feldman needed to earn his first win of the year, so maybe some of that San Diego magic can help out The Yu too.

Right-handed batters hit: .203/.331/.364 with 5 HRs off of Darvish, whereas left-handers go: .259/.352/.365 with just two home runs.

Darvish’s eight innings in his last start were the second-most he’s pitched, and the first time he’d eight-plus since April 24 at home against the New York Yankees.

When Darvish can spot his fastball, he can use his elite-level repertoire of pitches to beat any team, anywhere. However, Darvish’s ridiculously high 5.1 BB/9 ratio indicates that his worst enemy is himself.
Hami was 2-for-5 last night with 2 RBI

Texas Rangers (42-27)

2B Ian Kinsler
1B Michael Young
CF Josh Hamilton
3B Adrian Beltre
RF Nelson Cruz
LF David Murphy
C Yorvit Torrealba (.312, 4 HRs at Petco Park)
SS Alberto Gonzalez (.195 BA, 1 HR at Petco)
P Yu Darvish

*Both Torrealba (2010) and Gonzalez (2011) used to play for the San Diego Padres.  Tonight will mark the first time Yu Darvish will bat as a big leaguer. 

Bass

24-year-old Anthony Bass was a fifth-round selection by the Padres during the 2008 Draft. 

Bass hasn’t won a game since the middle of May in Washington, D.C. against the Nationals.  He has a home ERA of 3.62 and is 1-2 at Petco Park this season.  On the road, he has struggled mightily with just one win (1-5) and a ghastly 6.00 ERA.

Right-handed batters and left-handed ones produce almost the exact same numbers off of Bass.  RHB: .250/.325/.400 with four home runs, and LHB: .250/.328/.433 with—you guessed it—four home runs.

What gets Bass into trouble is his occasional lack of command, hence his 3.6 BB/9.


Prediction time:

As we all know by now, when Yu Darvish gets ahead of batters, he’s almost unhittable. When he hit his rough patch this season, he was over-thinking and struggling with command of his fastball. 

He was excellent in his last start, and Petco Park is repressive enough on an offense that Darvish can get away with a few mistakes here and there. As long as he comes right after the Padres, I feel he’ll coast to his ninth win of the year.

Hamilton and company will continue to beat-up Padres pitchers and the Rangers win tonight.

@TMurrayHowell

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Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Long time no talk!

Greetings to any and all from our recently concluded creative writing class. I miss you guys. In lieu of fiction fragments or synopses, here is a brief list of 10 things that you might not know about the Texas Rangers' (horrific) pitcher, Koji Uehara—plus some Haiku that puts the "poo" in poetry. Enjoy!

P.S. I plan on completing the rest our assignments in the next few days and will put them up on this bad boy of a blog for anyone to check out (or not). I hope all is well with everyone!

Things you didn’t know about Koji Uehara, and bad poetry

Last night’s drubbing of the helpless Boston Red Sox by a score of 18-2 (Koji Uehara’s happen too frequently to count anymore…) was a thing of absolute beauty!

Well, except for that little appearance by the batting machine with sideburns with his infamous splitter that doesn’t split and world famous hanging fastball.

When Koji pitches, it’s like the first time you got dumped. Sure, in a few hours you won’t care anymore, but at that moment you’re moved enough to write some epically bad poetry.

Here are three episodic Haikus followed by some things that you didn’t know about Mr. Uehara. Enjoy.

Koji Uehara

Enables opposition

Four-hundred foot blasts

*****

Koji Uehara

Needs to take his uncanny suck

To another team

*****

Anaheim Angels:

Koji Uehara might be

A great fit for you

*****

1. According to Elias Sports Bureau, when facing Koji, it is three times more difficult to NOT hit a home run than it is to take him downtown—or, as they say: “deep into the heart of Dong City.” Okay, only I say that.

2. Fellow Japanese import, Yoshinori Tateyama, was a High School teammate of Koji. Back then, Koji was an outfielder. Now, if you’re HS coach won’t let you pitch…Just sayin’.

3. During last year’s ALCS against the Detroit Tigers, Koji pitched 1 1/3 innings while surrendering 3 home runs…HE ONLY GAVE UP ONE FEWER HRs THAN OUTS RECORDED.

4. The whole “it ain’t over ‘till the fat lady sings” thing is tired and cliché. A better rested, new cliché should be: “It ain’t over until Koji Uehara gets an out.”

5. Forget number four. Realistically, if Koji is in there, the ******* thing is already over.

6. In Japan, a popular pitch is named “shuuto.” When Koji throws it, it is referred to as “shit throw.”

7. Throughout his Major League Baseball career (2009-Present), Koji has had an excellent walk rate. This is not due to his outstanding location or control. This is due to a basic baseball philosophy: Why walk when you can hit a home run?

8. Koji’s English translator isn’t even bilingual. Hell, he’s not even “bi.” He’s simply a tape recorder with a pre-recorded message that says: “I am sorry. I did not have my good stuff today. I wish to go back to Baltimore where the team is bad and expectations are low. Thank you.”

9. Fellow Japanese pitchers Yu Darvish and Yoshi Tateyama actually speak in English anytime Koji is near.

10. Balls thrown by Koji Uehara accumulated 3,000,000 frequent flyer miles last year. Koji’s balls cashed in the miles and, like, totally vacationed in Puerto Rico—where they were held, but not for ransom. Booya!

Thursday, March 8, 2012

Writer-Cize #3(Tim Howell)

It is challenging to keep my thoughts of Katy Perry's hotness—be it audibly, intuitively or writtenly—on the PG tip. This photograph, lovely as it is, was chosen intentionally by myself because it keeps my mind out of the gutter.

Sort of.

Well, at least it highlights the beauty of her face rather than other (ahem) more obvious physical attributes such as...

Cue the internal dialogue.

Don't think it Tim. Dude, just shut it down. And for God's sake don't say it out loud!

KATY PERRY'S GOT A GREAT BODY! GREAT BODY! LARGE, LARGE KNOCKERS! I COULD EASILY CUT OUT RED MEAT IF THOSE MELONS WERE EDIBLE.

My apologies. I'd feel even more sexist right now had this exercise not been about describing beauty. So I guess a little blanket objectification is par for this course. Besides, who knows, she may be a downright disagreeable person.

Okay, if I was writing about a woman that resembled this picture, I'd try not to put my entire impression of her down on paper. Obviously, this is the type of look that I like, but as we talked about in last week's class, unless I'm making this woman the antagonist, I'd better hold off on the super-hot attractive talk or every reader will hate her.

Also, of course, you don't want to overdo the character descriptions. If you do so, you stifle one of the best things about reading versus watching a movie. We love forming how a character looks—in our mind's eye, not someone else's—as we read. Now when I read and a woman is written as attractive, this may be how I picture her, but that's a digression as this assignment isn't about my own weird psychological makeup.

Okay, for real, here goes:

Dude this chick was smoking. The End. You see? We all can come up with a very different picture of this woman in our own minds, no?

Just kidding. Here's my no BS attempt:

I took my usual spot in the restaurant nearest the street-side window. The adjacent road was dark with a drizzled slickness. Drop by drop, the doldrums of my day drifted through with the same easy rhythm of the rain's soft patter.

I watched as an umbrella-less woman used a newspaper for protection. She ducked down low, arched her shoulders and scurried into the restaurant.

The muted jingle of the door's bells had just ceased as she removed the newspaper, shook it out, and then shivered dramatically. I hate to see a good newspaper get soaked...it falls apart, and becomes generally unreadable. But I enjoyed watching her shiver.

One look at this young woman, and I'd gladly run into the New York Times headquarters with a fire hose set to stop-the-riot-level.

Her hair hung low, but was frazzled with the unkemptness that only damp hair drying can provide. Her face held a soft glow that was just as intimidating as it was inviting.

Her age was a tough call. She could be 22, or 42. She had that type of easy, no hassle elegance that masquerades age effortlessly. We all know plenty of people willing to kill for that quality.

Her deep green eyes flashed towards my table. It was then that I realized I had been staring. I slammed my eyes down and rushed a sip of my coffee. It went down the wrong pipe and I started to choke and cough, while generally feeling like a total dumbass.

I felt a firm slap on my back, and when I looked up, there she was. "Are you okay?" she asked in a voice that purred soft as a kitten, while sounding just as dangerous.

Who is he?

Who is she?

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Synopsis for "The Designated Hitter" (Tim Howell)

Barry “The Bolt” Holt woke up from his dream of becoming a major league pitcher a while back. Occasionally a day or two go by when he doesn’t even think about it.

Holt was a “closer” in the minor leagues before he finally called it a career due to various arm ailments. The closer’s role requires a short-term memory to block out negativity. It also requires a kill or be killed mentality, as the game of baseball can be cutthroat.

Holt later learned that these unique gifts could also be handy in a different type of endeavor. Holt has been a contract hit man, or “designated hitter” since he left the game of baseball five years ago.

When Holt’s boss called him up with an assignment that required him to report to a minor league training camp disguised as a minor league hopeful, he was all over it. All Holt had to do was pretend to be on the team for a week or so and then get his man.

It sounded easy enough. Play some ball, do his thing, and then get paid. The only way this gig could go wrong is if Holt actually made the team. No way the sore-armed thirty-something could pull that off.

Little did Holt know that he still had some lightning left in that right arm of his.

Two weeks into minor league camp and his intended target is just as alive as Holt's baseball career. His velocity is up and he’s been lights-out. He's been so good in fact that he has been offered a different type of contract—one that might fast track him to the major leagues.

Finally, Barry Holt is within an arm’s length of fulfilling his lifelong dream. That is, if he can stay alive long enough.

Holt's boss is getting antsy, and if he doesn't produce soon, he will become a target himself. Is Holt's lifelong dream of becoming a big leaguer worth dying for?